This is a post where I share my failings…
About a year and a half ago, I felt God asking me to write a book. The idea of this task really excited me, because I was reading a book a week (with mostly “Christian” themes) at the time. I never thought it would be published, but I felt that it would be good to do it anyway. Let me first say that I’m not hundred percent sure it was God asking me to do it – but I was pretty sure. Anyway I started and saved my word document: “Project Obedience”.
I started with all the fervor one does when their starting a new hobby…and it lasted a couple of weeks. I got discouraged, because I doubted it would ever help anyone or come to anything. I didn’t ask people to pray for me to keep going, because I was embarrassed that if someone found out they would criticize my efforts or laugh at my attempts. I was scarred that people would judge my motives, and so I didn’t tell anyone…
I went from writing every day, to once a week. From once a week to once a month. And now as I look at the file on my computer it has been over a year since my last edit. In the meantime I’ve occupied myself with various other writing projects. Most of them lasting for a day, and some a week. Project Obedience was turning into project disobedience.
At the Navs forum I went to last week, we were given a presentation about how the UK Navs had started a publishing group. (Or something like that – I can’t remember the details). But they asked us if we had “any old manuscripts lying around”, and that we should send it to them because they wanted to create books written by Navs people.
Inside I was kicking myself that I didn’t obey. I don’t know if anything I could have typed would’ve been good enough to be published, and I’m not insinuating that if I had obeyed (and finished writing the book) God would have made all the doors open. But because I didn’t – I don’t know.
If you feel God is asking you to do or start something today, which seems difficult and pointless – do it. You don’t know what may happen down the line. Get people on board, even if they might laugh at you (like: Noah, Moses, Elijah), because they will help you accomplish what God’s asking from you. In this situation I may have missed God doing something fantastic, helping some people and surprising me. The truth is, I don’t know what could have happened, because I didn’t obey.
When you obey only when it makes sense…your not living by faith. Living faith-fully is when you obey even when it doesn’t make sense.